Today was the day. That thought had gone through her head like someone was playing DJ with that one note. Today was the day. This day she would confess that she had strong feelings for this person. She felt like her mind was going crazy, all these feelings, this wonderful person who does nothing more than being wonderful. Because that's what wonderful persons do. This wonderful person never failed to look and act cute, this person never failed to send butterflies in her stomach that burned every organ inside of her. She felt dizzy everytime she saw those beautiful eyes, she just wanted to close her eyes and breath in that wonderful smell that belonged to this wonderful person. God, she was lovestruck. She had never felt this way before. She had been in love before, but not to the point where her mind went blank and where she could think of nothing but her. The butterflies swarmed as she was sitting near this person, thinking of nothing but how it would feel to touch souch beauty. She wanted to touch, but knew that she couldn't. Not in that way, because at this moment they were just friends. God, she wanted to change that. Her head and heart was dancing on those pink clouds everyone mentions when they say that they're in love. It truly felt like her head was floating in the air, because there really was no one else but this person inside her head.
Today was truly the day she confessed. She didn't do it with a kiss like in most romantic movies. She did it with her words. Her own words, which most of the times make her sound like an idiot. "You're the one I have strong feelings for. I have feelings for you". The hug of two friends ended and the wonderful person just stared at her for a moment. The pink clouds were too thick so she couldn't quite see the look she was given. The words however.. "I can't return the feelings". It took a while for the head to come back to earth. However her mouth continued to do the talking. Laughing. Saying that it would still be OK between them. As long as she could be around this wonderful person she figured it didn't matter if they were friends or a couple. She still saw herself as lucky. The both friends parted ways in a good mood and they were indeed friends.
Then her head fell like a rock down to earth again. Fast. Her heart crackled in her chest and the butterflies were turned to ashes. Would they really be fine? You never know. Women tend to think too much and that's never a good sign. She wanted them to continue on as normal but how would it be when her crush got a boyfriend? She already knew that she couldn't stand that, that's what being in love means. What if she stopped being in love with this person and found someone else? Would she hurt the wonderful woman because she would think this wasn't serius?
In a way, she didn't regret that she confessed her feelings, but at the same time it makes things difficult and hard. The whole way home she wished she could puke. Just get rid of those loovey-doovey feelings that now were useless to her. She wished she could just throw them up and never think about it again. Her stomach twisted and turned as her throat closed up, trying to keep everything in. Damn throat that kept betraying her. As she stepped on the threshold to her house she finally got her wish and she threw up on the floor. And as she cleaned it up with a paper towel she thought "Maybe now I can finally move on".
... Yeah! So.. Based on a true story! I confessed my feelings to the straight woman and... That's exactly what happened... Well, I didn't threw up when I got home since I rarely do throw up, but I wanted to. So yeah! I just wanted to type exactly how I felt since I love writing about feelings! So there you go! I'm now gonna bury myself in my lovely sheets and get up in the morning... Oh, God this night is going to be terrible... Maybe I'll play some games until I pass out? Yeah! That sounds like an excellent plan! Bye!
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